In the first few days: what to say
News of a redundancy tends to leave everyone lost for words, the person affected included. The instinct is to say nothing in case you say the wrong thing. But silence is what weighs heaviest: your colleague may keep coming in for weeks, through a consultation period or their notice, wondering what everyone really thinks.
You don't need a speech. Find a quiet moment away from the rest of the team, say you've heard, say you're sorry, and say their work mattered. Then let them talk if they want to, and change the subject if they'd rather. A few plain lines will do:
- I've just heard. I honestly don't know what to say, but I wanted you to know I'm thinking of you.
- This doesn't change what I think of your work. You held [project] together.
- If you want to talk about it, I'm here. If you'd rather talk about anything else, that's fine too.
- I'd like to help with the search: reading your CV, putting you in touch with people, writing you a recommendation. Tell me what would actually be useful.
- Lunch this week? My treat.
What not to say, however well meant
Some lines come from a kind place and still sting. They play the situation down, blow it up, or turn the conversation towards you. Here are the usual ones, and how they sound on the receiving end.
- “Everything happens for a reason.” Maybe, but that's for them to decide, and certainly not in the first week.
- “I know exactly how you feel.” Even if you've been made redundant yourself, every situation is different. Share what helped you, if they ask.
- “Did you see it coming?” It suggests they should have, or worse, that they had it coming.
- “That could have been me.” It's a real worry, and a fair one, but it isn't their job to reassure you.
- “This place is a joke.” Running the company down puts them in an awkward spot, especially if they're still negotiating the terms of their exit.
- “You'll walk into something else in no time!” Kindly meant, but it's an empty promise. Offer something concrete instead.
Redundancy, settlement agreement or dismissal: reading the situation
Not every exit feels the same, and you won't always know the details. When in doubt, go by what your colleague tells you, and pass on nothing they haven't shared with you themselves.
- Redundancy: it may affect several people at once, and the worry spreads to those who stay. Don't compare situations, and let each person decide how much they want to say about it.
- Settlement agreement: the exit may have been negotiated, wanted, or reluctantly accepted. Assume nothing, and don't treat it as good or bad news until they tell you which it is.
- Dismissal: discretion comes first. Don't dig for reasons, don't pass on gossip, and judge your colleague on the work you saw rather than on what's being said.
- The end of a probation period or a short contract: they may not have been around long, but they worked with you. Sincere thanks and an offer of help are worth just as much.
Practical ways to help with the job search
Once the shock wears off, your colleague will be job hunting. That's where the team can make a real difference, with small things that cost you almost nothing. Whatever you do, wait for the official announcement, or your colleague's go-ahead, before discussing it with anyone else: it's their news, and theirs to share.
- Write them a detailed recommendation that describes their work and results, and that they can show to a recruiter.
- Offer to be a reference, and say so plainly rather than a vague “let me know if I can help”.
- Introduce them to people in your network who are hiring, or who know their field well.
- Read their CV or covering letter, and help them put into words what they're good at.
- Pass on roles that might suit them, without pushing if they don't.
- Check in a few weeks later, once the leaving has died down and the search starts to drag.
Writing a recommendation that genuinely helps
Of all of these, a written recommendation lasts longest. A kind word gets forgotten; a recommendation gets shown. Your colleague can attach it to applications throughout the search without having to chase you each time. And if you've agreed to be a reference, our guide to what employers ask referees will help you prepare for the call.
On Take Your Skills, you can publish the recommendation straight onto your colleague's profile. If they haven't got one yet, their email address is enough: they're invited to claim their profile, with your recommendation already on it. And if the blank page stops you, the assistant asks you about specific situations you worked through together, then suggests a text you read and edit before publishing.
A few rules so it does its job:
- Leave the redundancy out. The recommendation is about the work, not the circumstances of leaving.
- Describe concrete situations: what your colleague did, and what difference it made to the team.
- Stick to what you saw yourself. Your text carries your name, not the company's.
- End with a clear conclusion: you recommend them, and for what kind of role.
Marking the leaving with the team
Should there be leaving drinks for someone who's been made redundant? That's entirely up to them. Some want to leave with their head held high and the team around them; others would rather slip away quietly. Ask them directly, and make it easy to say no.
If they'd like something from the team, choose something that helps with what comes next rather than another object for a shelf. That's the idea behind the Leaving Pack on Take Your Skills: each colleague writes a recommendation in secret, with a free account, and the person leaving receives them all at once by email. They then stay on their profile, ready to show a recruiter. It's free, and it works just as well for colleagues working from home or at another site.
If they'd rather skip the drinks, a Leaving Pack is still a quiet option: it arrives by email, at home, with no ceremony. And if they want nothing at all, respect that and simply stay in touch. You could also send them our guide on how to ask for a reference, so they can collect more from former managers, clients and colleagues.
Example messages for a colleague who's been made redundant
If you can't talk in person, or want to follow up a conversation, a written message works well. Keep it short and plain, and end with something concrete you'll actually do. There are more understated lines in our guide on what to write in a leaving card.
- I heard the news this morning. I just wanted to say I've really enjoyed working with you, and none of this changes how much I rate your work.
- Thinking of you. If a written recommendation would help, I'll write it this week.
- It's not the ending you deserved. Your work on [project] speaks for you, and I'll say so to anyone who asks.
- Put me down as a reference and give out my number. I've plenty to say about how you work.
- I know a couple of people hiring in your field. Would you like me to introduce you?
- No need to reply to this. I just wanted to say thank you for everything you've brought to the team.
- I know the next few weeks will be hectic. Whenever you've got a moment, lunch is on me, and we don't have to talk about work.
- Thank you for your patience with me when I joined the team. I haven't forgotten it, and I'm here if you need anything at all.
And for those of you staying
Watching someone leave against their will shakes the whole team. Feeling anxious, angry, or guilty for staying is normal. Those feelings are fair, but share them with friends, your union or employee representatives, or your manager, not with the person who's leaving.
It's also a good prompt to look at your own position before anyone forces the question. Having up-to-date recommendations from people who know your work well is a simple precaution. On Take Your Skills, the Ask for a recommendation button on your profile gives you a link to send to colleagues, managers or clients.